I was never a person who woke up not knowing where they were. I always know exactly where I am. Yet for all the traveling I do, I still cannot fathom the physicality of it - of waking up in one city and going to sleep in another. It still blows my mind that all these worlds exist out there simultaneously. I love how travel makes new places real to the traveler, and how the existence of hundreds of peoples is realized.
I am still reeling from two days of non stop travel and 2 weeks of work, babysitting, school work, moving into my new apartment and catching up with the whole school, and have not yet processed Argentina, let alone Israel. They were both very separate, intense, and different experiences. There were some general things that I took away from the experiences...
There is no reason to not do what I want, when I want. This sounds very immature, but since I am naturally a strict self-regulating person, it's not! I have the power over so many decisions, and I can make them any way I choose. I can make things happen, or prevent them. Traveling does not allow you to be passive - something so refreshing after 2.5 years on a college campus where passivity comes rather easily. I wanted to work at this specific school in Buenos Aires, so I called until they picked up. I had spoken nonchalantly about visiting Kiah in Rio, so I booked a plane ticket. I needed to make friends once I landed in Tel Aviv, and I did. I wanted to see live music, so I called Maya and we went! It is strangely easy to feel incapacitated by freedom but I worked hard to make sure I wasn't.
I also learned to be nice to people, to trust them, and to accept the comings and goings of people in my life. I learned that I am capable of being friendly and outgoing when I try! Relationships of all kinds are always transitory and sometimes thats enough. Thinking to the sweet boy waiting for my bus with me in Buenos Aires, to Gonza and Maca, to Aileen, Daniele, Michelle and Maya, to Boots and Roman who lived across the hall, to seeing Raz for 20 minutes and running into Eyal biking to the gym on my walks home from work - all of these people have made these past 6 months incredible and vibrant. Thank you.
I learned that education and beauty can come in the most unexpected ways, and that the world truly is my classroom. So many times abroad I was so frustrated because I felt my peers were not getting a full educational experience and through this have learned how lucky I am to have an experience that stresses that the world is a place to learn, that this process is not (and CAN NOT) be restricted to a classroom. Related to that, I am coming to accept that I can only be responsible for my own learning and experiences, and whomever I can positively influence is a plus. But you must must must learn from everyone and everything you can. Visiting the community garden in Vidigal was huge for me - a little side trip Kate took me on a whim but changed my entire experience in Brasil. Listening to stories from the Windows kids had a similar effect. I really came to like those kids. I was so proud of them when we they presented for the British youth group.
Speaking of Kate, traveling makes you dependent on the hospitality of others, and this has made a huge impression on me (I have already hosted 3 little meal things at my apartment this year, and have attended them at 2 others). It is amazing how people go out of their way for you and take care of you when you are on the road. This is something that I find lacking in our culture at home - hospitality and generosity. I am striving to have more of this in my life. Thank you to everyone who helped me out - especially Kate hosting me for 5 days and showing me her inspirational life in Rio, Gonzalo and Maca for completely integrating me into their lives in Buenos Aires, Nicky for cooking us dinner, Ronit and Raviv for hosting me in TLV and driving me around and feeding me, Maya for sharing her bed, friends and wifi with me when I lived in suburbia, that random boy at TAU for giving me a room in his apartment the night I had to stay in Ramat Aviv, and Rebecca for a beautiful conversation and cup of tea at the end of her time in Israel.
Traveling through 3 countries in 2 very different regions of the world where I feel a strong personal stake taught me a lot about my positionality as a traveler, as a woman, as a mixed race person and as an American. I am learning how I experience the world differently with all of these intersecting identities. I have less patience than ever for bleeding hearts, though. That's not so noble.
I wish I had pushed myself to get into the Negev, to see the Wall up close, to get out of Buenos Aires more. But at the end of the day, I lived by the Mediterranean Sea, rode motorcycles in Vidigal favela, went to underground trap parties in Buenos Aires, ate dinner in closed restaurants, partied on rooftops in Tel Aviv with people from all over the world, hiked to the top of Dois Imaos, took twice weekly buses down the famous Avenida de Mayo, and met the next generation of peace builders in Israel and Palestine. What a gift this life is. Eternal gratitude to my mother, who does everything to make this possible for me.
My "culture shock" is manifesting itself in small ways. I still do the 'hand under the chin' motion that signifies "I have no damn idea" in Argentina, I keep trying to open magazines and brochures backwards the Middle Eastern way, when asked if I wanted a receipt at the grocery story I answered "si-ken-YES" and told the old midwestern bus driver "todah rabah" after she gave me my transfer card (they don't even have transfers in Israel). I'm sure the coming weeks will bring new insights into my time abroad, and that the reality of my existence here in MN will hit a little harder.
Until the next post, I'll be wandering wide eyed in American supermarkets, relishing having a dresser and a closet all to myself, decorating my beautiful apartment with my amazing roommate Emily, doing homework in the last of the warm sunshine and working on an application that would sign me up for the adventure of a lifetime...cross your fingers for me!
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